Thursday, November 22, 2007

A Time to Give Thanks

That would seem an odd thing to do two weeks after one's Mom's passing, but that is exactly what my entire family is doing today. I hope that I violate no privacies and I certainly won't mention names, but this has been a roller coaster of a week for a dear brother and our entire family.

My niece who gave us all practice in praying was in a very bad way this week. A very bad way - well she must have been and must be in great pain to think that the world would not miss her sweet face. I won't and just can't go into details but she is sitting up and in a regular hospital room and having Thanksgiving with her Mom and Dad by her bedside. We almost lost her this week after losing my Mom two weeks ago.

Thankfully we are instead back to mourning our Mom's death. Somehow that made a little more sense. Somehow there was comfort in that sadness. Somehow we could do the everyday things little by little, bit by bit and still be sad from time to time.

Life has taken on a strange patina in these past two weeks. But I'm thankful. Thankful for my family, thankful for love and thankful for loss. For without it, we'd forget how lucky we really are.

Oh yes - and I'm thankful for all of you that have stopped by or sent emails. Your words of love and support won't soon be forgotten. I am touched from the very bottom of my heart. Thank you.

And to my Mom - thanks. Thanks for showing me without ever telling me what makes a great parent.

Happy Thanksgiving to all. It's good to be back.

26 comments:

Claire said...

And I am are certainly happy to 'see' you back, tho I'm sorry about your recent family traumas. You are so strong and that is such a great example to give to other people (your mom's legacy perhaps?). I am also very thankful for my family and their good health. May it always be so.

Doug said...

Happy Thanksgiving, G. Nice post.

G said...

Claire, may it always be so indeed. Yes, inner strength and a formidable forearm are both traits that I inherited from my Mom. Thanks - we'll get through it all, by and by.

Doug, Happy Thanksgiving and thanks - for everything.

Nessa said...

I am very glad that your niece was able to eat dinner with her parents.

I just said a prayer for you all (and everyone else, 'cause who doesn't need it.)

Merry Belated Turkey Holiday. Come see my gobbler.

Mo'a said...

I am glad that you still have your lovely niece with you...sad the thought of loosing a young person before their time.
Normalcy is good, the sadness stays in our thoughts as a loved one never truly leaves us.
Much love xoxoo

ariel said...

So much wisdom in your words... I'm glad to hear your niece failed leaving this world.

Happy Thanksgiving!

Ann(ie) said...

I wanted to stop by and say 'hi' and give my condolences. I found you via Pavel. Thinking of you and I'm impressed with your strength and resolve. I have no doubt your mom is looking down ever so proud and smiling at her beautiful product.

Take Care.

pia said...

There isn't much I can add other than to say I'm glad your niece is on the road to recovery

I was thinking about you yesterday and hope that you managed to have a decent Thanksgiving

Gale said...

Happy Thanksgiving and I am thankful you are back.

TLP said...

Good to see you back.

Take care.

ann said...

welcome back...

sadly it's when something like
this happens to your brother and
his daughter that we realise our
parent's passing is the natural order,
as sad and tragic as it is.

it is right to mourn, but you have
happy memories of a wonderful lady

wishing your niece a speedy
and full recovery

lotsa luv ann xxx

actonbell said...

{{G}} I hope your Thanksgiving gathering was comforting. It's a blessing that your niece was able to have Thanksgiving with her parents. Our families are precious.

G said...

Nessa, Happy Belated Thanksgiving to you and your family. Thanks for the prayers - we can all use them. And thanks for your sweet support throughout.

Mo'a, it's true - they'll always be a place in my heart which will feel a little heavier for my Mom, yet lightened by her memories. Yes, young people are supposed to go on and live a good life - with all of its ups and downs. It's all that we've got.

Ariel, thank you. Just trying to get a bit of perspective. Thanks for your quiet sweet support throughout. An honorary Happy thanksgiving to you my friend.

Annie, thank you so very much for taking the time to do so. It's more than kind of you and quite appreciated. Pavel's a gem. Best to you.

Pia, yeah not much to say. Just hoping that life will be kind to my dear niece and show her a good path to be on. Thanks for thinking of me - we had a quiet Thanksgiving and that was okay for this year. Hope you had a wonderful one.

Gale, Hope you had a wonderful Thanksgiving and I'm thankful to see friends like you dropping by.

Thanks TLP - I'm on the slow slide back. So good to see you.

Ann, thanks so much. Yes terrible way to put things into perspective, but it's true. Thank you for your good wishes and warm words, they mean a lot.

Actonbell, it was quiet yet just the way it was supposed to be this year. They're precious indeed. I hope that you and all the Pez had a lovely Thanksgiving.

XOX to all1

Casdok said...

Lovely post.

Theresa said...

I hope your niece is doing better, and that she'll be out of the hospital soon. Even though your mother passed away so recently, I don't think giving thanks is such a strange thing -it's good to think about what you have, and hopefully that will make it easier to get through these days.

neva said...

SO very happy to see you here and SO VERY relieved to know your niece is out of the woods.

to be able to look up from your grief in order to remember all that you have to be thankful for is not just a good thing, it's critical. Life, while sometimes filled with terrible/sad happenings is also the Thing upon which we must focus -- we don't have to like and/or understand the "bad" stuff, we just have to understand that in the grand scheme of things, sometimes it is what it is: hard. but it's mostly good, and it most certainly goes on. And so must we.

you are surrounded by so many who love and appreciate you, G, and with good reason. you are an inspiration to us all.

may you know nothing but happier/peaceful times and joyful blessings from here on out. xox

Shari said...

I am so glad that your niece is okay now and her parents can be with her. Sad, yes. Especially after your mom's passing. I hope you all had a blessed Thanksgiving. Let us all remember to be thankful each and every day of the year. Take care. (((HUGS)))

Pavel said...

Welcome back, G! Hope things are looking up and that you had a wonderful Thanksgiving!

cindra said...

Welcome back, G. You are full of grace.

Kyahgirl said...

Happy thanksgiving G. I grateful that you didn't lose another loved one and that your niece is doing better!

G said...

Casdok, thank you and welcome. I took a look at your blog and *will* leave a comment. Your Harrods post was priceless. So I must come visit.

Theresa, as I said to Neva below (working my way upwards) - you are so right (you are two smart woman I might add). Being in our own life helps us to readjust and cope with the pain of loss. It is there, but it fades. I am sad, but I can still find comfort in the day to day life at home. ANd children are wonderfully selfish as they reel you into the present day with their own demands. Life is good and I have plenty to be thankful for. Especially good memories to hold.


Neva, I wish for you the very same thing. You're so right - life is beautiful no matter what. To still see your child cry looking for the dog to comfort him and grabbing him up and hugging him, well I don't need too much more of a reminder. To hear Tali play the violin as I putter around the house, well it's a gift. And in all of this, there are moments of sadness. But I also find myself smiling a bit thinking of conversations or how heartily my mom would laugh at the kids' stories. Yes, bit by bit we get up and continue on. Bit by bit.

XOX



Shari, Amen. Sometimes (often) we get wrapped up in worries of the future and forget to be thankful for the present. Guilty. My mom often told me not to borrow worries from tomorrow. She was a smart woman. Thanks so much. XOX


Pavel, if I look down I might get dizzy so up is a better choice. Thanks amigo, Thanksgiving was the start on the surreal path back to civilization. I guess that's good :)

Cindra, said the ballerina :) Thanks.

Kyahgirl, thanks so much. Our families are so much to be thankful for.

tsduff said...

Just walking down your paths as you write them brings the familiar feelings back from the places they had drifted to...

I love your thoughts - and that there are good ones along with the sorrowful. We are lucky to have loved such people in our lifetimes.

weirsdo said...

Was that the beautiful young lady who goes to Amherst and did the fundraiser? Anyway, I am so glad she is doing better!
A belated Happy Thanksgiving, and good thoughts for you and your wonderful family.

G said...

Terry, I'm accepting that this will sort of be my feelings for a time, bittersweet. We are lucky indeed. Thank you for walking that path with me.

Weirsdo, no, actually another niece. That beautiful young lady that you speak of has graduated Amherst and is off in South America doing some work towards her continuing women's health studies.

Thank you, they are so appreciated.

Minka said...

I understand the pain of both situations...the mark of a truly strong person is the ability to see the light through the shadows. I think you and your family are strong!

G said...

Minka, thank you. Often when one falters, the other helps her/him along. It's good to have support so that we can be. XOX