I've known my mother-in-law for more or less, eighteen years. I've been her daughter-in-law for a bit over twelve of them. It was not always easy dealing with her, but thankfully I've gotten smart - or worn down, dependent upon how you look at it.
My friend Jennifer lives for MIL stories which are a bit more sedate lately, but certainly still have their bite. Take for example her admonishing her cousin, Ella*, who happens to write books about her Holocaust experience and visits schools to discuss them. MIL finds Ella's hawking of books distasteful. Not one to hold back, she has told her that in more or less those words. Well, actually she indicated that a friend in high places has seen Ella in action and has relayed to MIL that she is forcing her books on people. All this is told to Ella for her own good, of course.
Last night, Tali indicated that Grandma asked her if her friend in school, Friend X*, had lost any weight. When Tali asked her why she cared (gotta love that kid), Grandma replied "She's a nice Jewish girl, she could stand to lose some weight." Of course, all for Friend X's own good.
Julian went to Grandma's after school today. On the way home from violin, Tali and I stopped to pick him up. She brought out some Israeli gum that is now deeply discounted after Passover and offered it to the kids. "It's coffee flavor." I asked if there was caffeine in it and she shrugged "I'm sure not much." It ended up being "cocktail flavored." "Great," I muttered "now instead of giving them caffeine, she'll just liquor them up." Not for their own good, but it couldn't hurt.
The gum turned out to be some fruity concoction which wasn't terrible. My MIL triumphantly huffed as she went to get a box for me to take "Nothing wrong with this gum, it's better than any of the American gum."
We got ready to go after she finished shoveling the rest of Julian's dinner into his mouth which I just ignored (for my own good). She mentions that Scissors is mad at her because "I asked him if he took away the quarters that I was saving for Tali in the jar."
"I don't know why he'd be upset, you just accused him of stealing...okay, maybe borrowing without asking." I deadpanned. She smiled sweetly.
She decided it was the cleaning lady whom she never wanted to begin with and is long since gone.
When I got home I said to Scissors "heard you got into your Mother's quarter jar."
"Here we go with the quarters again." he snaps.
"I think I'll take Louie for a walk." For his own good, of course. Unlike Scissors, I have learned to edit out the rage from MIL's outrageous comments and just laugh. She still gets me annoyed on a bad day, but I tend to address it and drop it. After all, she's only telling me something for my own good.
*NAMES CHANGED...for their own good.