Wednesday, August 15, 2007


You know getting information funneled down in a large family can sometimes prove to be very much like a game of telephone.

But firstly - thank you all for your caring words regarding my Mom. She is in the hospital and so far nothing specific is showing up in the tests (MRI/catSCAN, etc.). She is having a stress test tomorrow and all things being equal (to what, I'm not sure), she'll be going home by Thursday. She has a hairline fracture in her forearm and of course, contusions on her face and near her eye. Answers as to why this happened may not be evident.

The truth is - this is one tough woman. When she blacked out, she fell down with the impact of a boxer being knocked out and got herself up. My brother and I joked that raising ten children can do that to you. She actually never went to the hospital at that juncture because apparently in Anytown USA, volunteer ambulance corps come and check you out and leave that option up to the patient. The patient in this case is 82 and has just passed out and looks like she has gone twelve rounds with Mike Tyson. My mother being stubborn as she is, called her sister to take her home instead. My sister was then called who took my mom to the hospital where she is undergoing the various tests.

By the time this information gets to me (#7) in the hyperbolic family game of telephone, she has jumped from an airlifted ambulance as she refused treatment, taking a doctor hostage in the process. Still home for a cup of tea though.

My family has a slightly warped sense of humor, but thankfully my mother can still appreciate our odd takes on life such as they are.

It's hard living far away (and having small children) as I can't just drop and run. But I will see her this weekend and she will be staying at my brother and SIL's house as she recuperates.

So thanks for your good wishes. I'll keep you posted when she invades Iran.


Carrie said...

I'm glad that you seem to be in better spirits, and that nothing obvious is wrong with your mom. I know it must be hard on you and yours, but like you said, she is one tough lady.

BIG HUGS to you and the crew and know that there is power in faith and prayer.

(SMUSH) just for good measure. :)

Claire said...

I love your sense of humor! My mom calls herself the "old warhorse".
Hope you have a nice visit! ((HUGS))

Anonymous said...

hah! now i absolutely know where you get your spunk and wonderfully skewed sense of humor.

soooo glad she's okay(ish). soooo sorry this had to happen, in the first place. i trust those annoying "tests" will tell doctors what the heck caused the fall in the first place? (too much religion? not enough for breakfast? rotten kid standing next to her sticking out his/her foot??)

glad you'll be able to sit down with her over tea by the weekend... guessing by then the story will include aliens, 3 ponies, and a run-in with Karl Rove. ; )

hug your mom for me, and tell her your NBFF sends her much love and lots of prayers for a speedy recovery. xox

heh, my verifier is "vlshpuh", which sounds like the Yiddish word for "damn, I've fallen and I can't get up!"

G said...

Pinky, thanks for the smushes and good wishes.

Claire, I'm laughing at your Mom - ole Ironsides ay? Thanks - for everything :)

Neva, hahaha - too much religion/not enough for breakfast, all in the same technical medical category right?

I will give her all the hugs and good wishes. Yes, by then she'll also have taken out Karl Rove AND two aliens on three ponies (and rode away bareback!).

Gotta have a sense of humor. I just dare you not to in life.


PS: Actually I think you're right on the Yiddishism my little Nevala :)

ann said...

what a relief... we all know it could have been much worse, but hey our mums (mine is 83) are tough cookies; built to last and run on steam.

you may be 7th in line, but it means not everything gets loaded on one pair of shoulders; that sure has its advantages

humour goes a long long way in the road to recovery and the road of caring for the aged

thinking of you

lotsa luv ann xxxxx

Sweet and Salty said...

G, I'm so sorry about your mom. (I just read your last two posts/)
I'm glad she's as tough as she is, being that old, I think they used to build better models back then (grin.) Hug her lots!

Ariel the Thief said...

good news yaaay!

I'm a little worried about Iran, though...

Logophile said...

poor Iran, they won't even know what hit them.

G said...

Ann, they are tough cookies, aren't they? That is a good thing about big families, more to share in the joys and the difficulties. We all have our own lives, but we can always count on each other - no matter what. That's a comfort. Then add in the humour (love British spelling)!


Pavel, they just don't make 'em like they used to. I'll give her hugs this weekend. Thanks.

Ariel, Yay and thanks indeed.

I'll talk to her this weekend - maybe she could leave the country out of it and just open up a can of woop ass on that little weasel president.

Logo, it'll be quick. :p

Nessa said...

Glad to hear your mom is mending and that you are doing better. Laughing at ourselves does help.

Shari said...

Sense of humor is good. After all, it's good for the soul. It's nature's medicine. I have a warped sense of humor where I find things funny and my kids just shake their heads at me, saying, "Only my Mom!" LOL.

Glad your mom's better.

FirstNations said...

oh babe, i'm so sorry. are we in the same boat or what?
if i could have done anything different with my FIL it would have been to insist that he go into an assisted living situation sooner, even if it pissed him off. he would have had more time to live a better quality of life.
of course you can't do that and it wouldn't have worked. but damn. this is exactly how it started with him. spells. passing out. and he did the same damn thing...resisted until his health was too far gone to operate.
it would be so much easier if we could use a damn cattle prod!!!!

tsduff said...

Your Ma is lucky to have kids like you G, to rally around and fix her up. She may be stronger than anything, but nothing works better toward feeling better than having your family near by. The weekend is almost here :-)

Mother Theresa said...

This visit is long overdue, and there's no excuse to be had. I'm trying to get around to all my favorites, and it's taking me much longer than I would like. I'm sorry to hear about your mom, and I hope they find out what's wrong before she invades Iran. It's good to see you take the whole situation with a wonderful sense of humor; I guess that makes it a bit easier, although not everyone has that ability.

Minka said...

I am glad to hear of her recovery, seems all she needed was a few minutes to get up again.

Your family sounds like a hoot and life is supposed to be taken with an odd sens eof humor. Contrary to general opinion,God doe senjoy a joke. Why else would we be here?

Have a fun weekend with her and here is to teh next cup of tea!

Doug The Una said...

Poor Iran.

Best wishes for a quick recovery. We still have a lot of butts need kicking.

robkroese said...

Wow, I'd like to hear more of the stories that are 7 people removed from reality. Exciting (and very funny) stuff!

Gale said...

Well don't let her invade Iran by herself get her hooked with Sylvester Stallone. I hear is looking for some extra work.

Miz BoheMia said...

Oooh! Do keep me posted if she ever invades Iran! I am sure she can kick some mean ayatollah ass and then some she sounds that amazing to me amiga mia!

May her healing go smoothly and well and may there be no serious underlying reasons for this accident to have happened to begin with. I am sure all is well and hope that I am right in my conviction. That having been said, such love, fabulous humor and care that she gets from you all will keep her going strong I am sure!

Here's to you guys enjoying your time together and laughing it up as I type! Besos and enjoy each other mucho...

G said...

Until I can get in here and leave a proper thanks and response, please accept my sincere thanks for all of your kindnesses.

My blogger buds are the best in the world!


Anonymous said...

FYI: Mr. Banana told me he is looking to hire some new Blackwater employees (evidently this is a new sideline, along with the real estate speculation he and Tali are involved in). He said your mother, as "one tough broad" would be a shoe-in, but warned that in the current political climate she may have to undergo sensitivity training.

Anonymous said...

Sorry, that's "shoo-in." It's late, and the concert was tough.