Thursday, May 03, 2007

Rummaging...

...something funny, light, amusing.

She rushes around straightening up the couch cushions, shoving piles of clothing underneath. Oops, "Sorry Julian, come on out" They'll be here any moment, must have the place in order. Should I put out drinks? No! Don't want anybody getting tipsy and finding the mess I've stashed. How about coffee? "Scissors - lattes on the round!" I cry. "We're expecting company - the doors are going to be beaten down by visitors from The Mattress Police! I told you not to cut that damn tag off!"

I became an adjutant inspector today over at The Mattress Police blog. When I wiped the tears from my eyes, I wasn't really sure what an adjutant inspector did...or does or should do. It sounds terribly important though and I will try my best to live up to the irresponsibilities that such a post requires.

The truth is I can trace the genesis of Diesel's arrival on Central Snark. He seemed to appear like an alien from a space ship out of nowhere. Naturally, we all (Neva and I) dropped everything and surrounded his ship - looking in at him quizzically and then laughing at his audacity. And months later, we haven't stopped looking - and laughing. He's a funny guy. The kind of guy that you wished occupied the next office over so when that 3:00 lull hits, he could make you laugh and then you'd go home. Something like that. Instead I hit his blog at the 3:00 lull, he makes me laugh...and I go home. Give or take an hour time elapse.

Okay, I'm off to really clean up the place so that I can go to bed and dream sweet dreams...I wonder - will I have to wear a uniform in this new roll? It could make mornings getting out of the house that much easier.

G'night.

17 comments:

co-ad. inspector, neva said...

...as opposed to "co-ed inspector", i suppose. ; )

i say we get matching uniforms, NBFF! something with "Mattress Police" over our chests and "No-Longer Teen Girls Squad" on the back. just think of the looks we'll get every time we walk arm-in-arm into Starbucks (plaid skirts might be cute, too!)

That Diesel is a goo...er, GREAT guy -- and it does seem like only yesterday he was trying to horn in on our inheritance "windfall" -- which we tried so desperately to reap, despite the fact we never sowed and/or sewed. sigh... they don't stay unknown puppies for long, do they? xox

Claire said...

Yes, Diesel is the funniest guy I 'know'. Wouldn't miss him.

goldennib said...

I have these fantasies about gathering the people I've met online into one company. I think it would be so much fun and interesting. But would the business survive?

G said...

COINBFF: I love the matching uniforms! We tried desperately - I know one of these windfalls are just waiting for us. Note to selves: learn to sew.

They sure don't stay unknown puppies for long, NBFF. xox


Claire: He does grow on you.

Goldennib: I agree. It depends - would it be monkey business?

Doug said...

Do you get to carry a taser? Those are cool!

G said...

Yes we do Doug, and if I get pulled over by the police, I'll just tell them that I'm with the Mattress Police.

I wonder if Diesel has a PBA card equivalent.

ann said...

he is rather brill... his ideas are hilarious and I'm glad I found him too

just wish I had more time to get to every post instead of my once a week if I can manage it

do you think he just likes girls in uniform ;>)

First Nations said...

please tell me that doesn't apply for sofa pillows. because i just bought some and

and



......

Diesel said...

Girls... in... uniforms...

Snap out of it, man!

Wouldn't it be great to have a big bloggy get-together? Y'all could come out to the Diesel estate, but I think it's a bit of a hike for most of you. It would probably be just me and Claire. Hi Claire!

G said...

Ann: that's such a good British word - brill! Yeah, of course there's that girls in uniform angle.

fn: That's it young lady - where's my taser?

Diesel: That would be so excellent - and I do like the looks of the Diesel Estate! There'd be no getting rid of us though.

Doug and the Ole Mule are planning a get together for next March in Chicago.

Claire said...

Ok, us west coast folks need to hatch a plot. Diesel, there must be others in your fan club that live nearby...
Get to work on it man!

Miz BoheMia said...

Diesel be funny FO SHO though I am outta the loop I am afraid seeing that I mostly have read him over at the Snark... *sighetty sigh*

I CAN very much relate to cleaning and such though.. *groan* Having been MIA from the blogosphere hath made a dull bohemian of me I tell you, DULL!

I missed you amiga mia! Big boho neshikot flying your way!

Logophile said...

Hey!
Can I have a uniform too?
I won't wear it right and will refuse to adorn it with an adequate number of pieces of flare, but STILL, sounds fun!

G said...

Claire: I say you storm his orchards and hide in the tree houses!


MizB: That is where Neva and I first made his acquaintance. You can't be taking on anything else right now. You're busy making your way back to us, until then we'll fill you in as the good adjutant inspectors that we are!

Big neshikot to you too, so nice to see your wild and wonderful bohemian face here. xox


Logo, of course you can have a uniform - in fact, I think they might be mandatory. No need to adorn, just to be worn. Oh and tasers are being distributed as we speak. I got to use mine on First Nations this past weekend.

Minka said...

Congratulations. I donæt know what the new position entails, but I hope it doesn´t make you laugh too much and you spill bubble tea all over yourself :)

Hobbes said...

Sounds like a pretty soft job to me.

G said...

Minka, that is the downside of the job, but I'm willing to go to full lengths for this position.

Hobbes, don't knock it until you've been given such responsibility. There's also the hiding the taser so my kids don't use it on each other or that I don't use it on them in a down moment when I've forgotten my meds. Just kidding authorities.