Tuesday, April 08, 2008

Ambivalence rears its ugly head...

I'm not sure what I'm doing of late. I have sat down to write a post, well two times anyway, and stared at the page. I have to say that I'm feeling a bit self-indulgent about blogging. Maybe cynical. That and my computer connection was screwed up for a couple of days, perhaps that's part of the cynicism. I started out blogging for a creative outlet and some days it's all I can do to think of what to actually post. It seemed at some point I actually wrote something. With being sick, I didn't feel like putting on the computer. Now I find that it just zaps too much of my time. I don't know.

I'd let you in on a little of my thought process, but my mind is racing so that I can't always keep up. I find myself getting into worry mode as the school year approaches the downhill slope. What will the summer bring? What services do we need to address on Julian's IEP? How is he progressing? Time for a new evaluation? Same doctor or new doctor? Are we doing enough? How is Tali holding up to the rigors of school? Will I lose my job? Will I keep my job? And so forth and so on.

So hey, glad you stopped by? The good news is - I'm not one to wallow.

This cart is parked on the campus of Tali's music school. There is a website that has everyday objects as faces that I must find to send it to.

 
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I don't mean to imply that life is bad - it's not. Life is beautiful. And what is life without worry? Well, I think that's actually checkout time. I signed up for the late checkout, thank you very much.

11 comments:

Ariel the Thief said...

Thank you for letting in your thought process! Do you also mean it as an excuse for not posting a Saturday Spin? :-P Best wishes! Hope worried questions will leave you soon.

G said...

Why yes, Ariel - it is my all encompassing excuse :) In fact, in blogs and out of the blogs!

I think the worried question thing is part of my makeup. I just give myself calming answers. Of course, you'll all have every right to wonder about me - talking to myself, talking to molding...

G said...

When did you become a thief by the way? I seem to have missed the crime.

Theresa said...

I'll come and read about your worries any time, at least I know I'm not the only one with worries. My blog is still new enough for me to spend way too much time on it, but I'm sure the excitement of it will wind down and then I won't know what to post about either. Or maybe not, I'm addicted to it, it keeps me sane amongst the worries. Anyway, hope the worries go away and that you'll have more time to blog or do whatever keeps you sane. :)

Doug said...

Life isn't bad but it sure does get complicated sometimes and there isn't much in the way of sureness except you can trust that by the time you know what to do you will have done something else. Of course, I take that as a sign to relax.

Tom & Icy said...

Whenever you think you got the answers, they change the questions.

tsduff said...

Hey you! ECS... I feel your angst. Sometimes we have a clean flowing stream to enter on our blogging pages, and at other times we are dry as the summer wind through the cornsilk. I mainly enjoy browsing through folks' blogs just to keep up with happenings in their lives, as well as to share my own. I hear your worries - and hope you don't lose much sleep over them. My job is a worry (as in, "Do I quit today or not"...), Do I plan to move, rent my house out, become a bag lady... you know, the usual self doubts and insecurities that rush in. Bleah. I'd rather not dwell on it.

Nice cute car picture - I like his ears.

Nessa said...

I understand how you feel.

I call it feeling pooky.

Mo'a said...

I know where you are coming from. There is so much competition for ones time. You have a young family to take care of...I have aging parents.
I just love just knowing that you are in bloglandia now and then.

G said...

Theresa, I think you get a little worry kit the minute you give birth (not that life was worry-free prior to motherhood, but it sure sometimes seems that way). I hear you about blogging. In many ways, it has been therapeutic for me, so I'm not going to shutter the place just yet :)

Doug, I like that sign. I'm going to bed.

T&I - too true, my friends.


Terry, hey you WCS...I think that I enjoy blogging for the same reason. I just felt a little disconnected for a bit and guess I'm just getting my sealegs back. The worrying is part of life, and I'll join you in not dwelling!



Nessa, I like that - feeling pooky. Yup. You do have a way with words.


Mo'a, you know exactly of what I speak. I'm so happy that you're in my little blog neighborhood too!

Ariel the Thief said...

G, talking to ourselves is important, never stop doping so! I think I was born to be a thief. But I don't steal form the rich only. ;-)