A FAIRY TALE

ONCE UOPN A TIME, there were two girls who met in a funny land where words connect people. It is called The Blogosphere. They met at a place called WAKING AMBROSE (a blog, near as they could tell , that was dedicated to some dead cranky old man) where they became fast friends. Their names were NEVA and G, but they called each other "NBFF" which stood for New Best Friend Forever! They were silly like that. They each met a lot of nice people in this Blogosphere, and Neva had been friends with SAR - a real life belle, who encouraged her to visit Doug's place. The girls had each been shy to join in the fray that occurred daily at Doug's but before long G exclaimed to Neva "hey I can be as sarcastic as the next fellow" and Neva responded in her best Groucho Marx voice, "Well move over and let me talk to the next fellow"! From that day forward, they shared lunch in CENTRAL SNARK.

Long fairy tale short - the day came when the NBFF's would meet The Belle of the Brawl - Sar!


First G drove to Neva' s house and they hopped into Neva's super fast hotrod because as NBFF's they had a lot in common, like being late, and they had to drive really fast like 80 or 140 MPH or something pretty quick anyway. While Sar waited for her hotrod friends to arrive, she sipped coffee and dreamed of new threads to adorn her lovely self with. She was very sweet and didn't even hate the NBFF's when they were late-ish. She was gracious that way - a real belle!



Finally the three girls met! It was as if they had been friends for a long time and in many ways they had. They had a nice lunch together which seemed to stretch out a long while. When they told the waitress how they met, she acted like the three were celebrities. In all fairness, the three girls were pretty much the most excitement the place contained. They were so animated in their conversation and laughter.

After a lot of fun and silly picture taking, they parted reluctantly and promised to keep in touch. This fairy tale has a very happy ending because both Sar and G got homemade cookies from Neva as she is very nice like that. And they all went to bed that night with smiles on their faces and fond memories of a day spent with great new old friends.

THE END.

ROAD TRIP!

Look at that gorgeous Fall Day. I'm not working today. I won't be home for most of the day either. This could only mean one thing -
ROAD TRIP!

A road trip, if you watch the video that I linked to, will include smoking, drinking, shoplifting, and making rude gestures to truckers. Come on, what do you take us for? A couple of teenagers?

The most exciting part of the trip is that we'll be having lunch with somebody known for her:


Did you guess? Well stroll through CENTRAL SNARK where all the details await you.

I'm sure you're doing something equally exciting today, so you know, enjoy work or whatever.

"You're my blue skies..."

This day started off pretty cranky in these parts.

Yup, started off raining, kid tantruming, having to go to two separate coffee establishment due to long lines or indecsive minds, evil office assistant playing Muzak which promptly had me envisioning myself dropped into a depression ad..."There she sits at her desk, the post that she just wrote disappeared, how can she recuperate from losing the only shards of brilliance her day would hold...". Back to the bad day - getting tapped on the bumper by somebody who was having a problem comprehending the Universe's Alternate Merge Theory and thus almost ran me off the road. When I did get out of the car to check, instead of finding a menacing smartass behind the wheel, I found a sweet young woman who very apologetically said "I had no idea that I hit you, what can I do?". I do feel slightly bad that my response wasn't something more comforting than "learn to drive".

The evil office assistant gets on my nerves for reasons such as the following interaction. When a coworker comes back in from the outdoors she feels the need to ask "Still raining?" even though the sun is shining brightly through the windows.

Hold on! The sun is shining! Holy Moses, that means I'm supposed to be happy! Hope springs eternal.

Have a nice day now.

PSA

We interrupt the inertia of this blog at this very moment, to bring you a very important announcement. Today kicks off NaNoWriMo! No sillies, it is not another Jewish Holiday that I'm trying to slide in under the radar. What's that? You in the red - "Why didn't I bring this to you sooner"? Well, I am a procrastinator and very rarely see the value of something until it is upon me or perhaps, has even run me over.

Okay - you in the back, "What the heck is NaNoWriMo?". Heh heh, funny. No, "it is not where the detainees from Gitmo are being transferred". Well had you paid attention and been following along at one of the baddest MUTHA'S blogs around, you would have known that it is National Novel Writers Month!

Here's the lowdown - 30 days, write every day, yada yada yada - you've got yourself a 50K word novel at the end. No I did not say published - as if. Okay, every link above explains it just a tad better and with a bit more detail.

But since it starts today, I just thought it would be a valuable tool for every budding writer out there (not me of course).

Well, come on what are you waiting for? Wipe the Snickers remnants from your face and head on out!

I've got a plot to consider for the novel that I'm not writing.

Watch out for the Goo Goo Muck

"When the sun goes down and the moon comes up
I turn into a teenage goo goo muck
I cruise through the city and I roam the street
Looking for something that is nice to eat.
You better duck when I show up...
the goo goo muck. "

CLICK HERE IF YOU DARE...



Thanks PAVEL! Without your expertise, well I would still be sitting at my kitchen table listening to this song for the 854th time. All technical credit for this post goes to Pavel whether he'd like it or not.

What's it all About?

I just read a post on a "Mommy Blogger's" blog that deals with her angst at someone swiping a picture from her flickr account of her child and altering it and posting it on this scum's blog in some mean way. Not sexual. Mean and stupid. Coward.

My first reaction was to run in and check on my sleeping children so to speak. You know it's a screwed up world. You know that. I know that. It's just, why would somebody do something so hurtful? I don't really know the players. It's not important. In the call and response, there was some discussion (maybe 1% of the comments) that indicated it's a big world on this here Internet and you shouldn't post pictures of your children in a public account such as flickr.

That got me to thinking. Well, in my true procrastinating style, I do have a flickr account, but I don't think I have any pictures in it. I do have pictures of my family in my blog but who the hell even knows me? But I can't say that I haven't thought about having posted the pictures.

Reading her account and as I read the comments, I felt a little bit sick, as if I had served my children up on a platter for viewing. I feel stupid and vulnerable. I share stories of my life because I like to write. The pictures that I have used thusfar are a little sideshow to the story. I feel that I have control and can shut the door whenever I like. But now I'm left with a lingering doubt about having identified any of us. It's not like anybody could find me in "a boro of NYC". Okay that narrows it down to about 8 million people. Close. It's just that I have shared my most precious treasures with the world. And sick bottom feeders like this can take a picture of a sweet little child and put a mean caption. Or take jabs at the parents for even sharing in the first place.

So here's the thing. I would shutter the place up yesterday if I felt that my family was compromised in any way.

For now I'll just put the chain lock on as I mull this crap.

Who Says New Yorkers Ain't Friendly?

The other night I had to do a little shopping. Truth is when is shopping really pleasurable anymore? It's always I need this and I have to get that - for the kids! Rotten kids, always wanting to be first. Me me me. I'm kidding, okay? Okay.

So I am in search of what would seem to be The Holy Grail - yes, a plain navy blue sweater, the finest in the kingdom. How about the school's requirement - navy? So I strike off in search of this. No go, but I did find pillow shams, a jacket for Julian and socks for me.

While I waited in line to pay, I noticed the man's cart in front of me had pillows, a wooden vase and a towel. Nosy? Just passing time. He turned to me and must have noticed my noticing and asked "nice vase isn't it?" I reply "Why yes, I was just admiring it". He brags as he holds it up "What do you think, probably go for about $60 bucks in one of the stores in the city"? Me, "at least". As a frame of reference, the city he refers to is Manhattan, we are shopping here in Queens.

It's a long line, this store is infamous for them, but I decide to make the most of it with Stuart. He then goes on to showcase his poetic side by reciting several haikus, the self described most devastatingly touching line ever written - "not because I wrote it, people have had that reaction."; I reply "Of course, that's beautiful". I must admit to not hearing half of it as he went into a raspy poet voice in a lower register as price checks were heavy in the air at the adjacent register. He seemed pleased that I liked it. He was suing whichever drug company puts out Lipitor.

He then went into standup mode and told me several of his own jokes. We talked about our heritage and found our commonality - we're both Jewish - he by birth, me by choice. Both of us have some suspect heritage - he suspects his was Irish (which is my heritage for the most part) and I suspect mine could have been Jewish. He was quite interested in the heritage thing, but we quickly moved on to sports. Stuart was a great baseball player in his time (he attempted to unload an official Mets jacket as we waited). Thankfully I had the foresight to answer in the negative when he asked if anyone in my family was into official baseball jackets. As a New Yorker, you just know where these type of questions are leading. Stuart was still in good shape, as he patted his tummy, at 66. Yes, he had a hairtrigger temper, but not like in his youth when he would not hesitate to knock an eight ball right between your eyes in a fight. Somehow I sensed that about Stu.

He gave me his card which he explained had Alex on it because his middle name is Alexander and if I ever wanted a baseball jacket, well to please give a call.

With further exchanged pleasantries, we parted. I don't know, Stuart's a lifelong New Yorker - seemed pretty friendly to me.

The Bloggers' Picnic

If you go into the blogs today
you'd better go in disguise
If you go into the blogs today
You won't believe your eyes.

For every blog that ever there was
Is gathered there for certain because
Today's the day the Blogosphere has their picnic.

Ev'ry blogger who's commented
Is sure of a treat today
And our "friendly" CURMUDGEON HOST
Will savagely make you pay.

Beneath the trees where nobody sees
in a spiral of templates that once
were TOM&ICY'S
He's waiting there for his next victim.

Yes you think that they're RETIRING
or taking a break to GATHER STEAM
But Doug has taken the writer
and drowned them in a stream

So enter there and see who knows
the killer of the blogs is not Ambrose
but simply said that scallawag
who mimes him!

THE SOCKS ARE ON!

Yes, it is that time of year dear reader to start wearing socks again.

This may seem like no big deal to you, but one of life's little pleasures for me is when the weather hits warm enough a few days in April and then for the duration in May for me to go without socks. It's summer, it's carefree. Dress is casual for work. Life the way it almost should be. Then the calendar turns to September and I grudgingly spiff up the wardrobe a notch but I don't wear socks yet. Oh no. Has to be pretty cold for that - like today. So I have broken out a pair of socks. I must admit that I feel cozy and warmer, but slightly restrained and less carefree.

Wait a minute, what were we talking about again?

The Cornsilk Blue Sundress

I was doing the final switcheroo of clothing today. You know, putting all of the summer things away and taking out all of the fall/winter clothes. It seems we're getting to that time of year when we need to be ready for any eventuality.

This is always a full day mammoth event for me. Because as we put away, we ferret out what is too small. Then we decide what goes to whom. Have to find out if Owen (my nephew) hasn't bypassed Julian. I've joked with Owen's parents that we might soon be up to the "hand me ups" with Owen giving his clothing to Julian. But for now, the really cool items go to Owen and then the other wearables go in the charity bag. Same with Tali. Her fabulous hand me downs go to Sara (my friend's daughter) and then the others to charity. Except Tali has begun complaining that Sara whines too much, especially when she doesn't like what she's wearing and doesn't deserve any of her hand me downs. She wants them all unequivocally to go to charity. She has me thinking. They're on the floor between the black charity bag and the bag I had out for Sara. Although Tali has already made up her mind, I'll sleep on that one.

Some things I can't help, they never get given away. Case in point - yellow soft as the day is long dress with a small guitar on the front from the Gap when Tali was about two. It's a size 2. I remember how she looked in it; it came down mid-calf. She still works her way into it and wears it as a jammy shirt with a soft pair of flowery cotton pj pants. It was one of those dresses meant to go through the ages with her.

Then there's the cornsilk blue sundress with yellow sunflowers. This was a hand me down from her cousin Amanda. The first year, it was too big. The next year, she wore with a white tee shirt beneath. The next year it fit pretty decently. This year she wore once or twice, but mainly used it to put on Julian when she played dress up. My Mom was visiting for that one and she got the best laugh she's had in a while watching that vaudeville act. Julian played it up too in full character. I'm laughing thinking of that.

I'm also shedding a tear because truth be known Amanda's life has not flourished as her sundress has. She is now thirteen and poised to enter those difficult teen years, except she's been having difficult years probably up to and after that pretty sundress made its way into our home. Her mother has withdrawn from all family contact, may or may not be using RX drugs for non RX uses and the children have lost contact with their lifeline. She has struggled in school and spent a large part of the past year out of school being homeschooled. Although by whom would be anybody's guess. She is apprently back in school this year. And I sat and shed a tear because I remember when she and her Mom on a girls' day out came to visit us after we first had Tali. She was only five and we have a picture of her smelling the beautiful multi colored mini rose bouquet they brought for us that day. Her long auburn curls and freckles captured so sweetly in the sunlight.

Amanda I hope you again smell those roses.

Come waste your time with me...

If I were half a blogger Part MMXXVII:

This episode finds our hapless unhip to the unwitting eye non-technie blogger trying to post a song to her blog. Had she succeeded she would have posted the song "Waste" by Phish. And you would be having your coffee and browsing through the list of "Essential Albums" as voted by the listeners of an Independent radio station that I listen to from Fordham University in New York, call lettersWFUV:






Bob Dylan, Blood on the Tracks
Bruce Springsteen, Born to Run
The Beatles, Abbey Road
The Beatles, Sgt. Pepper's Lonely Hearts Club Band
The Beatles, Rubber Soul
Joni Mitchell, Blue
The Beatles, The White Album
The Beatles, Revolver
Van Morrison, Moondance
The Clash, London Calling
Bob Dylan, Blonde on Blonde
Beach Boys, Pet Sounds
Paul Simon, Graceland
Carole King, Tapestry
Neil Young, After the Gold Rush
Lucinda Williams, Car Wheels on a Gravel Road
The Rolling Stones, Exile on Main Street
Miles Davis, Kind of Blue
The Grateful Dead, American Beauty
Bob Dylan, Highway 61 Revisited
Derek and the Dominoes, Layla and Other Assorted Love Songs
Pink Floyd, Dark Side of the Moon
Allman Brothers, Live at the Fillmore East
Van Morrison, Astral Weeks
Joni Mitchell, Court and Spark
Simon and Garfunkel, Bookends
Crosby Stills and Nash, Crosby Stills and Nash
The Band, The Last Waltz
The Who, Who's Next
U2, The Joshua Tree
Steely Dan, Aja
The Band, The Band
The Who, Tommy
Crosby Stills Nash and Young, Déjá vu
Bruce Springsteen, Greetings from Asbury Park, NJ
Jackson Browne, Late for the Sky
Radiohead, OK Computer
The Band, Music from Big Pink
The Beatles, Meet the Beatles
The Rolling Stones, Sticky Fingers
The Grateful Dead, Workingman's Dead
Allman Brothers, Eat a Peach
Bob Marley, Legend
The Grateful Dead, Europe '72
Bob Dylan, Bringing It All Back Home
Elvis Costello, My Aim Is True
Emmylou Harris, Wrecking Ball
John Coltrane, A Love Supreme
George Harrison, All Things Must Pass
James Taylor, Sweet Baby James
Stevie Wonder, Songs in the Key of Life
The Who, Quadrophenia
Bob Dylan, Desire
David Bowie, The Rise and Fall of Ziggy Stardust
Bruce Springsteen, Nebraska
Crosby Stills Nash and Young, Four Way Street
The Rolling Stones, Beggars Banquet
Blood Sweat and Tears, Child is the Father of the Man
Counting Crows, August and Everything After
Bruce Springsteen, The Rising
The Rolling Stones, Let It Bleed
Ella Fitzgerald and Louis Armstrong, Ella and Louis
Neil Young, Harvest
Dave Brubeck Quartet, Time Out
Elton John, Goodbye Yellow Brick Road
Meatloaf, Bat Out of Hell
Neil Young, Harvest Moon
Nick Drake, Pink Moon
Tom Waits, Closing Time
Radiohead, The Bends
Pink Floyd, The Wall
Tori Amos, Little Earthquakes
Van Morrison, Tupelo Honey
Talking Heads, Stop Making Sense
David Gray, White Ladder
Elvis Costello, Imperial Bedroom
Cat Stevens, Tea for the Tillerman
Eric Clapton, Clapton Unplugged
Frank Sinatra, Songs for Swinging Lovers
Johnny Cash, Live at Folsom Prison
Jefferson Airplane, Surrealistic Pillow
Joe Jackson, Look Sharp!
Joni Mitchell, Hejira
Fleetwood Mac, Rumours
Stevie Wonder, Innervisions
Wilco, Yankee Hotel Foxtrot
Laura Nyro, Eli and the 13th Confession
Little Feat, Waiting for Columbus
R.E.M., Automatic for the People
Ryan Adams, Gold

But alas dear bloggers, tis not to be...today.

Is your essential on there?

Now I'm up well beyond the curfew so I wish you all a good night and a good morning and a great weekend.

Now scoot on over to the THE SNARK where music continues to permeate the airwaves.

Board of Education You're Pissing Me Off!

ADDENDUM: Well it seems calmer heads have prevailed and the red tape has been cut through - for this round. I always know that it will happen, I just don't know how long it will take to cut. Thanks to all for your comments of support. I know that I am in the toughest school system in the Nation. That said, there is a good education to be had as long as you are an active involved parent. So thanks again (and maybe this will get Dr. Minnie Strator off my back). Have a good weekend all.

ORIGINAL POST:

For the the uninitiated - I have two children. We live in a boro of New York City.

My oldest will be 9 and the youngest 5 (within the next 6 weeks so may as well get used to the new ages). A tale of two educations. I know many of you know the names but somehow I'd like this to be a bit more anonymous. Helps with the rant.

Oldest went to PS in our boro up until this year. The switch happened for a number of reasons. Driving the bus was the inability of Oldest to be challenged by anything they threw her way. Except it seemed in behaving. Her boredom drove her to distraction - artwork not always flattering, whatever she felt could fill the time. Through word of mouth and excellent test scores, Oldest has landed a scholarship to a private school. She is thriving and doing well. She has to wake up earlier which as you saw in our last post can be quite the challenge, but if I have to walk her over the 59th Street Bridge, she will not miss this opportunity.

On to Youngest. He has entered the fine NYC Board of Education this very year in Kindergarten. He has issues which need to be addressed in an IEP (Individualized Education Plan) to help him achieve the goals for the year. He has been in a pre-school setting for three years in a school that we loved. It is mid October and we are still ironing out wrinkles in the school's trousers. None of that is so troublesome. What is troublesome is when I go into the Office and see the Vice Principal in the Inner Sanctum busy being busy and so I just knock and enter to the surprise of her and the Principal. Oh Mrs. Lampshade, I know you must want to speak to me but we're having testing today which will start shortly. Well then I'll be brief. I go into my concerns to the nods of the sods with promises to "check into" and "deal with it" and blah blah blah.

The kicker is I get an email this morning praising how well Youngest is doing in blank blank (which I never even raised an issue with) and blah blah (also ?). I send an email back which basically says "don't pee on my leg and tell me it's raining". I'm waiting for a reply.

So NYC Board of Education, I know you have a million kids to deal with but to me, mine is ONE IN A MILLION!

Let's cut through the red tape and deal with the issues at hand. Being defensive serves nobody, least of all - my child.

A Quickie

Just a quick little post. I need to get more sleep because many mornings I feel like above picture. I'll let you in on a little secret. In my family of origin, I have been known to be called "The Slug". Let's just say that I enjoyed relaxing. I recall my sister saying to me once, "You ought to write a book about wasting time". Well I thought that was a little unfair - so I knew how to amuse myself with little effort. So R, at your behest - now I just blog about it.

Thing is - ah yes, my kids are like me. The three of us in the morning are all like this little fellow up above. Tali gets up and even makes the effort to run through the kitchen and back into her bed. Julian burrows back under the blankets as he narrates the story "Leave him alone - he wants to sleep!" Me? I'm usually the one who Julian has come to burrow in deep next to. I can't get up yet, he's holding onto my hair. Which leaves one other person - the early riser, Mr. Scissors. The one attempting to roust this motley crew. Day after day we torture this man. Neither child has taken after him when it comes to this quality of being an early riser.

Look on the bright side Scissors, you have the choice of 2 1/2 baths until the rest of the crew awakens. We love you, just not so much in the morning. I promise things are looking up - I have that new alarm clock coming. You know the rubber mallet!

I better get to bed - 6:00 a.m. comes rather quickly, as does 6:15, 6:30...

This I Believe

I was with Tali in the car this afternoon enroute to her violin lesson when we heard the following on the radio. It is an NPR series of essays, entitled This I Believe.

In this particular essay a fourteen year old boy who has Aspergers Syndrome discusses what he believes. It was very moving and it started me thinking what I believe. It also started me thinking about Julian and his learning difficulties. When I hear a young man like this speak, it does make me hopeful that Julian will find his niche in the world. It seems in many ways that he already has.

Well I am in bed typing this (read on) with tissues scattered about, watery eyes and a red nose - sexy huh?




I am therefore off to count sheep. If you like, tell me what you believe in the comments. But by all means, when time permits listen to this essay. Gives you pause.




Aaaachoo!

G'night.

Nice Breasts

I'm sure you'd like to keep them.

October is Breast Cancer Awareness Month. This goes for you guys also. Breast cancer does not discriminate. So if you haven't checked your breasts lately - do so. If you haven't checked your loved ones - what are you waiting for?

The truth of the matter is that my mother is a breast cancer and ovarian cancer survivor. Thank G-d she is here with us today. It is this family history that seems to have kicked me back into the 70 year old male category when I took THIS TEST. It really is a nice wake up call to see what you are doing wrong healthwise or perhaps in your case, what you are doing right.

In my case, I am not taking such good care of myself. I have not had a mammogram in...it's time for me to schedule one. Also post secret: I lie about doing self exams and only do them when I suddenly startle myself into the realization that I have not done one in...The truth is (I'm being truthful) sometimes I'm really afraid of what I'll find. I know that's not rational intelligent thinking. I know. My children are another story - I took my daughter to the doctor for a mosquito bite (that's what it amounted to). What's that Julian? Eyelash in your eye? I don't like the curve of that lash - get in the car, let's see what the doctor says.

Now then, this brings me into the current state of affairs. Yes I know, yesterday I was skipping and running through an apple orchard and today I'm going to talk about depression? How odd. That's why you should take the D train HERE. I have been thinking lately of a struggle I have been having with depression. You see it was vanity that sent me to the doctor because my medications seemed to have packed on some extra poundage as one of those lovely side effects. But the truth of the matter is that I really began to realize that this is depression we're talking about. I was not feeling great and the weight gain was the least of my problems.

I wrote a post about it and decided to stick it on the blog linked above. I don't know if I'll keep it or scrap it. I do know that I need to acknowledge the genetic factor and listen to how I am feeling. I guess if I am being truthful here, I don't really like the connotation or association of the word "depression". It makes me feel so, well, depressed. I feel stigmatized. That I am "crazy". Suddenly people will start looking into double meanings in my posts - signs of my deteriorating mental health. You know I am partially kidding, right? Who says you can't have a sense of humor about depression?

Would it kill you to laugh along with me on this one?

APPLE PICKING AND COW TIPPING

So off we went for our annual apple picking extravaganza yesterday. Yes there I am in the orchard sort of in action. We're having some problem with our picture downloads so the action shots may well have to wait.

Several posts back, my niece Caitlin talked about her and her sister Shannon's dessert dilemmas that they often found themselves in (as she writes about here. I shared that somehow this rang true for us when it came to apple picking season. Each year we would go off into the bucolic setting of an orchard "upstate", read 1 hour north of the city. The air would be crisp, the apples plenty and the children well behaved. Okay, usually the air is always crisp. Just kidding kids - it was lots of fun huh? Anyway, the sky would be the limit and we would pack up our bags with all the pickins of a day well spent in the clean air.

We would get back to the car, invariably an apple or two tucked into somebody's pockets and head home. Yes home. As thoughts of apple pie, apple sauce, apple betty and just apples danced through our head as we traveled "The Hutch" back to the city. What would happen in the ensuing weeks would be closer to reality. The apples would be placed in the downstairs fridge. We'd keep a supply upstairs to pack in lunches each day. Give some to coworkers. Some to Grandma. The weeks would drag on and we'd comment - "should we attempt the pie this weekend?". "Yeah we should shouldn't we?".

But look at that - another weekend come and gone. Now the apples had little by little dwindled down to the last measly batch which were only suitable for apple sauce or lobbing at the squirrels digging up holes in the backyard. In the interest of having something bountiful from our apple harvest, we'd make up a batch of apple sauce. And lob the last two at those rascally squirrels.

But this year is different. I can feel it. We're going to buy the frozen crusts so as to avoid the annual sabotage that has cursed our apple harvest.

Stop back in a week for a slice. In the meantime, stop over to muffin-land for a different take on the apple picking tour.


Little Footnote: It should be noted that no cows were harmed in the making of this post. The cow tipping reference is from the a song on a cd that we had playing in heavy rotation that day:LOU REED by The Little Willies

If it's the weekend...

I know, I know. Four days have passed without mention of a Holiday. Don't worry - everything's fine. That's because we have been preparing for the last part of this Holiday season called Sukkot which starts tonight (with Shabbat ~ the Sabbath) by constructing our sukkah. This is a really joyous and fun holiday and nicely rounds out the season of the High Holidays for us. We spent some time last night decorating and will finish today. Why there's a little sideways glance of the decorating committee in full swing.

So thank you all for your well wishes for the new year all along. If you're confused as to what the heck we still have to celebrate about, just click the link above.

Since it's the weekend, I know we all have something to celebrate? Have a great one and see you in the sukkah! By the way, Tali-muffin put up her own post about decorating the sukkah HERE

On a sidenote, but deserving of a post in and of itself is the very tragic incident in the Amish country this past week. The thought of this horrific slaughter has haunted my thoughts all week. One day, perhaps Tali and I will tell you of our family trip to the Amish Country and meeting Lydia Ruth. I could not close without mention of this tragedy and hope the poor people effected find comfort in their memories. Although how, I am not sure. Until then, please keep this community in whatever prayers or thoughts are a comfort.

Peace.

Tali's biggest fan:

I was just going through some photos that are on a disk in the laptop. They're actually not recent - from last year. This one is Tali at her Third Grade Writing celebration. We are invited to listen to the children read their perfected writing piece to the parents and perhaps, grandparents. The hands in the photo are that of Tali's Grandma (my MIL, salami dealer, eternal source of aggravation to her son, the only person known to have brought herself back from a near death experience with Tylenol and a bedside glass of water - my MIL). None of that is important. The important part is her relationship with her grandchildren which in this case, are my children.

I love the proportion of the hands in the picture. That about sums up her enthusiasm for anything her grandchildren do in life. She could not be more proud of Tali if she actually were on the stage at Carnegie Hall. Which I am sure she fully expects to happen - only her version is "let her live - to be healthy". My MIL still earns a living outside of some small pension and social security through seamstress work(she would die if she knew I shared this so - you know). She works for a woman who has a shop in one of the wealthiest neighborhoods in the city - ask Pia - 10021. She works from her home though now and only occasionally - during the busy season. It is from this busy season, that she puts aside Tali's violin tuition which she has insisted upon paying.

The beauty is how their relationship just flourishes. Tali was so attached to Grandma - went crazy for her up until about four or five years old. She wanted sleepovers, etc. Then she went to school, made friends, started playing violin, in other words, developed in childhood. But Grandma expected it and took no offense. And anyway, there was Julian now wanting her attention too. The thing is Tali will still ask to go to Grandma's on occasion and who wouldn't as a child? She cooks them whatever they want when they walk in the door - from scratch. She plays Rummikub for hours with her, needlepoints, gets out the watercolors and they paint together. Really quite nice. The funny thing is when Tali (which rarely happens with Grandma) gets cross when Grandma has pushed too far. As in the other day. Tali went there after an indoor pool party and sleepover at my very good friend's. She was very tired and had napped at Grandma's. This was before the Holiday started Sunday night. Apparently, between rolling over, she was peppered with just a few questions - "Who was there? How is A's new apartment? Is it nice? Do the kids like it? What did you eat for breakfast? Where did you go for lunch?! Did Daddy pick you up? Where did he pick you up?" This I know because when Tali finally came to, quite cranky and I asked her one question - she said "enough of the questions, I'm sick of you and Grandma asking me questions!" Then went on to recount the above list of Grandma's. Grandma stopped, slightly widened eyes that displayed only mild shock and guilt on her part and without missing a beat asked, "Who's hungry?"

We all filed into the dining room.

YOM KIPPUR

We are preparing for tonight's start of the holiday of Yom Kippur. I have attached a link with explanations of the Holiday here.I'm a little preoccupied getting last minutes Holiday details in order so I will wish all of my Jewish friends and family an easy fast and gamar chatimah tovah; and to all my non-Jewish friends and family peace and love and a good weekend.

What Are You Looking At?

...You talkin to me? Go ahead, knock this blog off my shoulder. Dare ya.

Just practicing my tough stance for fighting. Something about a brawl.

Okay okay - I'm Sar's guest today at the one and onlyBELLE OF THE BRAWL! Could I be more excited - not!

So go visit me there pleeeaase. I told her I had friends - people who knew people. It's a lie I know, but I wanted in and there was this qualifying questionnaire. No, really that's a lie - about the questionnaire. It's all above the boards. And guess what? Sar needs a guest for next week. I don't know if they'll be bloodletting, but it always looks like fun. Weren't all schoolyard fights as long as you weren't involved? There I go talking like a tough again, people might get ideas...

If you've happened to wander here from Sar's, it would have been nice to have a post proper up. But you know that family I was talking about over there? Funny thing is they make demands on me..."Sleep with me Mommy" No. "Tell me a story" okay "Just lay with me while you tell it" Alright - move over...

Five hours later after awaking in a twin bed with a small arm acroos my face, from a stress dream that (no surprises here) involves the New York City subway system (what I had to go through to get a Metro Card), I jump on the computer to put this word about my guest post in. What happened to the other parental unit? He looks pretty comfy in our bed right now.

So in the interest of continuing sleep and hopefully a dream that has rainbows and butterflies and lovely music and clean homes and organized filing systems, this post will have to do.

Sweet dreams.

The Black Shirt

I do quite a bit of musing while driving. So this morning's musing surrounded around my new black shirt:

Ode to New Black Shirt

You will never again feel this fresh
Or have just this hue in your threads
You will be washed
shrink
fade
Lose elasticity
maybe get a small hole and I'll still wear you

But you'll be comfortable
You'll fit me softly and perfectly
You'll end up as pj's when you get too faded
But that's when you'll be closest to my heart.

And that reminds me of my husband. Mr. Scissorhands. Relationships start off so new and fresh. You think things will never change from there. They do. Good times/bad times. The bond deepens, you gain a few pounds, he loses a few strands of hair. And here we are - seventeen years after first meeting.

Feel this cotton.

Must be Rosh Hashanah

The crickets are singing some of their last choruses of the summer.
The wind is blowing a nice soft breeze in through the window as I type.

Who shall live and who shall die?

Although the day was warm, the evening breeze is cool and crisp
Foreshadows an autumn nip in the air.

Who shall live and who shall die?

On Rosh Hashanah it is written
On Yom Kippur it is sealed.

And possibility and hope are thick in the air. For we Jewish people, this time of year is very spiritual. No matter your level of observance, I am sure that you can't help but reflect who you need to "get right with", what you may want to change, and then the deal goes down. Your fate is sealed for the next year.

Sort of like applying for a job or making a credit application. Only you wait for the disposition for a whole year. You don't really know until next year now do you? If you know sooner, well - that's not good news.

So if I may, Jewish or not - today may just be the day to think who have I offended, where have I been less than "impeccable with my word" as Don Miguel Ruiz states in the first of THE FOUR AGREEMENTS? ThanksNEVA for that one. And reflect. Alternately, if you go down to a moving body of water and throw some bread crumbs in, you can symbolically have cast your sins upon the water and fed some birds in the process.

Or you could just grumble that it's Monday and grab yourself a TGSL and think about it all on your way to work

ROSH HASHANNAH

We are closed in observance of Rosh Hashannah, the Jewish New Year. Wishing you a healthy and sweet new year. For some basic definitions and explanations regarding the customs of the High Holidays, please click HERE.

If you'd like to leave a Thanksgiving recipe, continue on to the All in the Family post that follows. A good year to all.

ALL IN THE FAMILY

Well, things have been a little hectic of late. Did I mention I'd be posting daily, every other day? Good, I hope not. As my days blend into shoveling kids on buses, traveling from Queens to Suffolk County to Manhattan...I'm a little on the side of bleary in the eye. My family of origin - crazy lot that we are, have intermittent family emails going. They run hot - 20 to 30 a day back and forth then...cold - silence. Then back and forth. Out of one such bombardment, it was decided that all would turn up at my sister Susan's home for Thanksgiving (at her invitation of course). You see, it seems she has sold her house as her husband cooked dinner one evening (I digress) and this would be their last Thanksgiving at their lovely home that has hosted many a fun filled family gathering. My niece Caitlin emailed her plans for dessert below which I then just asked if she would make her offer to bring dessert into a post for this here blog. How sweet! Yeah, read on.

Without further adieu, let's give a nice warm Simply Said welcome to my niece Caitlin! Make it warm, I'm trying to talk her into starting her own blog!

CAITLIN AND SHANNON BRING THE DESSERT

My name is Caitlin Rush and my big sister's name is Shannon. Shannon is a senior at Amherst College where the bohemian environment serves to encourage her attraction to organic food and interesting recipes. I am a deferring Smith student, a fact which could be used to prove my tendency to delay or avoid even the most necessary of decisions.

Shannon and I commit to the simplest of ideas only after enduring the same amount of mental strain that most people reserve for buying a new car. We have to "test drive" every idea and possibility that pops into our head. A phrase that comes up too often when we are trying to accomplish something, "Well what if we...instead?"
Imagine that Shannon and I have offered to bake dessert for the Thanksgiving family dinner?

Shannon and I decide to bake a cake. As we flip through my Moosewood cookbook looking for a good cake, we decide to make something more interesting, like a trifle. However, one of us mentions that a trifle may look a bit ambitious. After discussing the various pros and cons of a trifle, we decide that the family would be happier with something more traditional, like a pie.

We'll then go to the grocery store for pie ingredients and walk back and forth in between the frozen food aisle and the baking aisle over and over again, trying to decide whether to buy a frozen crust or to make one from scratch. We'll call my mom, who will tell us to buy a frozen one.

We'll get off the phone and decide to do neither, screw the pie, and flip vigorously through the pages in my cookbook in the middle of the grocery store trying to find something else to bake. We'll decide on cookies. Shannon will want to make some interesting fusion of peanut butter cookies and macaroons, using Splenda and unbleached flour, and in listing the potential ingredients for these splend-nut-aroons, we'll call my mom to ask if we should pick up some baking powder. Mom will be exasperated with the two of us and say that if we're making cookies, we should make chocolate chip cookies. We'll get off the phone with mom and deliberate for a while the possibility of reviving the pie idea, until we remember the crust issue. We'll leave the grocery store empty handed, at 10:00 o'clock as the grocery store is closing, the day before we're supposed to leave, knowing that mom always keeps a 5 lb bag of chocolate chips at home... just in case.

Around midnight, covered in flour and amidst a destroyed kitchen, we'll throw our burnt cookies away and overpack our bags with three outfits and a wide selection of pajamas for the next day and go to sleep.

We'll stop by the grocery store again in the morning (ignoring the points and stares form the store clerks who angrily waited for our departure the night before so they could close up), and head straight to the frozen food aisle where we'll plan to buy three cheesecakes, pondering for half an hour whether to buy three plain, three different flavors, or two plain and a variety box. At this point Shannon will tell me to call dad for some input. He'll tell us to buy whatever, the Rushes love cheesecake, but to hurry up.

We'll end up choosing three plain, a variety pack and a strawberry, another thirty minutes later, ten of which Shannon and I will have spent in front of the pie crust section of the frozen food aisle where we fretfully discuss the possibility of buying the frozen crust and pie ingredients and baking the whole pie at Aunt Sue Sue's. At the checkout lane, Shannon will realize that she left her discount card in the car so she'll run to the car to get it, leaving me behind with one of the disgruntled cashiers. We'll finally pay and leave and arrive at aunt sue sue's two hours late (not to the surprise of any of our relatives, some of whom will have been waiting to see which cheesecakes, if any, we will arrive with, having been informed of our dilemma hours earlier by my dad, and some of whom will arrive after Shannon and I, having encountered various dilemmas of their own on their way to aunt sue sues), with hot cheesecakes, because we will undoubtedly either forget to buy ice, or decide we don't need it.


POSTSCRIPT BY AUNT G:

You mean you two don't make the cheesecakes yourselves?!

It's come to this.

It was only a matter of time. You do your best to raise them well. You know they will fly on their own some day. I just wasn't ready for the day to be so soon. That's right, sniff sniff, Tali's started a blog!

Oh I know I've been careless for I'll never forget how she was drawn in when she first saw PANSI! She made me play it again and again. That should have been the tipoff. She walked by and would see the eye-catching art of David LaChapelle in MizB's header and casually ask "MIZ B?" Whenever she would read NBFF anywhere, she would say "Is that NEVA?" It started, where many bloggers linger - at DOUG'S where I believe a story inspired her to comment. It wasn't long before Doug had a little hanger on (without a blog). Well Doug, as you noted in my guest intro, now you are back to having only friends with blogs.

Nobody under the age of 13 can start their own blog on Blogspot. Fine with me, Tali can be found here in MUFFIN-LAND (name inspired by another of Neva's fab finds - MUFFIN FILMS).

I still haven't figured out how or if I can get rid of my profile from appearing on her blog as it seems we are inextricably linked in blogs as in life. That's fine as I like her under my protective wing. So stop by and say hi to the new kid on the block before I rethink the whole thing.

Have a great day!

BOOK MEME

I've been tagged by one of the readingest buddies in the blogs,KYAHGIRL!It had been and still partially is a crazy week, so I am getting my sea legs back so to speak, and will endeavor to get myself in the posting mode again. The meme is about books and I will say that I have always loved to read. Particularly I can remember during summertime as a child, when with nothing but our bikes and imaginations, my friends and I would take off for the library. Well we always brought a little mischief along just in case, but that's a story for another day. We would park our bikes outside and go into the cool hallowed halls of the library. I can still picture the children's section downstairs. We were avid readers of the Happy Hollister Book Series pictured here:

Now I know I was young when I was reading them eight or nine years old, but I always laughed at the characterization of Mr. Hollister "graying at the temples" at the beginning of each book and would read that aloud to my mother. They were just a little too perfect in my recollection, but we did enjoy that series and they passed around among our little posse. Then we would resume sitting on the porch steps before figuring out what next to play, whining "I'm boooored". No summer camp for us.

Before we go the meme itself, I'll preface it by saying that my memory is vague on details at times and I have gotten rid of quite a few books in past years because I just can't hold onto them, so this is truly those books that spring to mind - a book association, if you will.

No offense to all memeists, but I find these hard/silly to do as I will surely change my mind just as soon as I have saved the post. Having said that, here goes:

1) One book you have read more than once.
The Womanly Art of Breastfeeding - LaLeche Leaugue International - what? I needed reinforcement with both kids. Whoever said it's the most natural thing in the world was not breastfeeding at the time. That and Charlotte's Web by E.B. White (most recently, a couple of years ago with Tali) springs to mind - one reference, one fiction (you guess which is which).

2) One book that you would want on a desert island:
That's easy - The Torah. There are a lot of characters and plot development that I need time to absorb, and I am sure there is a life lesson for any situation that might arise. Truth is I'd need a rabbi for interpretation - make him a cute one since we're on a desert island (no commandments against that).

3) One book that made you laugh:
Breakfast of Champions by Kurt Vonnegut. I went through a period of reading one Vonneugt book after the next. I just remember reading this and laughing. At least, I believe it was this one. What was the one with the recipes? Well it made me laugh, maybe it's not the one I'm thinking of, but I laughed. This is what I allude to when I talk about the vagaries of memory.

4) One book that made you cry:
Most recently, The Human Stain by Philip Roth. Just a bit of a sad yet funny commentary on the lost souls of society woven so beautifully yet mournfully together. I thoroughly enjoyed this book, but it did make me cry.

5) One book that I wish I had written:
On the Road by Jack Kerouac. I just loved the whole feel of the Beat Generation - so on the precipice of a cultural explosion. I'd love to have been a fly on the wall and written this one. I read this in SanFrancisco and Hawaii which was a lovely backdrop and brings back fond memories of our honeymoon.

6) One book that I wish had never been written:
Although technically described as a pamphlet or a text, it's close enough to a book to me and that is The Protocols of the Elders of Zion. It was anti-semitic propaganda purporting to outline The Jewish plan for world domination published in the early 20th century. Although the feelings (and this text) are still alive and er, poison in the 21st century, I'd still prefer if this had never been "cooked up". It makes me sick to my stomach.

7) One book that I am currently reading:
The Four Agreements by Don Miguel Ruiz. This because my dear friend NEVA has thought enough of me to give it to me to read. I am enjoying its message immensely. Any book that can simplify my outlook on life down into four agreements can't be all that bad. Okay I oversimplify, but really the book gives you another scope through which to understand the source of other's communication and our reactions thereto.

8) One book that I have meant to read:
This is just crazy, but it doesn't say name the only book that you've meant to read, just one book, so that would be: The Only Dance There Is by Ram Das Ram Das is a Harvard Psychology Professor who became a psychedelic mind explorer but the book itself is based on his talks. He's a bit far out, but funny and with a positive outlook. I haven't gotten past the halfway mark, but I keep it nearby in case...

9) One book that changed your life:
Black Like Me by Howard Griffin This was long before I had read any of Richard Wright's books and was my introduction to the harsh realities of racism in America. I would not too much later come to see these harsh realities with my own two eyes. Frightening.

10) Tagging. That Ariel doesn't have a blog, but hey I know plenty of people, myself included, who would lend you theirs. No pressure - really. You could even answer one or two in the comments and I'd give you a pass grade. And WEIRSDO, again this is a kinder gentler game of tag. You could dispute whether I had actually tagged you or just brushed your sweater...

Hi Ho Hi Ho...

That's right - it's back to work. No, I'm not in construction. This is just what I will brandish if anyone actually expects me to work today.

Now in the vein of the great and talented
VILLAGE IDIOT, why don't you drop by and leave your favorite Work Song to inspire me throughout my first day back at the grind.

Have a wonderful day all!

ADDENDUM 9/13/06: No post, so just keep adding your songs or whatever you like...just remember I still have the big wrench here (which I just noticed looks like a big industrial G). That's me - always observing the obvious two days later.

2,996

The sign-up for this tribute was closed when I attempted it this morning. I first read about it at TRUTH IS FREEDOM. If you go there, Brian has all the relative links to the original project site. It is a wonderful idea that I would have liked to have included myself as part of, but I've read some beautiful tributes this past weekend (Brian has written an especially nice one). Bloggers have signed up to write tributes to those who were lost on that day. It is nice to see their individual lives memorialized.

September 11, 2001 - 9/11 - truly a date that will live on in infamy. As is customary on national holidays and as many did in the immediate aftermath of this tragedy, I am flying my country's flag in honor of those lost on that day.

But what a beautiful day it started off as. I was 7 months pregnant at that time and was commuting to work in Manhattan. I would take the QM12 Express Bus into the city on the days that I worked (I was always off on Friday). This day as many will remember was just a gorgeous September Day - the bluest of blue skies greeted me that morning. The bus ride was no different than other days - the bus making time in the bus lane on the Long Island Expressway (LIE)to the Queens Midtown Tunnel. Between Julian kicking madly in my uterus while I would try to read a book, I would look out the window at the city skyline and just ruminate about life with my hand reassuring Julian that he would be here soon. Then we entered the tunnel and it took us a long time to get through. Too long - what's going on?

We got out of the tunnel at very close to 9:00 and there were sirens screaming through the air. Police cars, fire engines speeding by. The unmarked official black vehicles. People were on cell phones on the bus with reports streaming in that a "commuter plane" had hit into the World Trade Center. As we crossed 34th Street and looked downtown, there was the thick billow of black smoke pouring out of the Trade Center. By the time I was walking to my office, people were out near cars, gathered near delivery trucks listening to radios - the second tower had been hit. By the time that I got to my office, I just sat in my chair dazed listening to the news on the radio. Some of my coworkers went downstairs to watch news on television, but I just sat there at my desk. I desperately tried contacting my best friend in life who works in the World Financial Center, to no avail. Thankfully by afternoon, I talked to her and she was okay and coming to meet me. My experience of that day was different than hers, I did not see things first hand. She saw workers plummeting to their deaths from her office building. When I met her, she was shellshocked.

I know I changed on that day along with millions of other people. I became more patriotic then and I remain so proud of this country now. Because I know when you say America it does mean a country of freedom, caring and helping those in need, despite what others would want the world to believe. I know that because that is who I am and I am an American and these were values that I grew up with and impart to my children.

My heart weeps for those who lost someone on that day. We must always remember - never forget.

This post is in honor of our fellow human beings who were lost on that tragic date. May their memories all be a blessing to those they left behind.

Hey, teacher, leave us kids alone!

Alright breathe deeply. It's only the first week of school and I have a meme due, emails to answer, no posts within spitting distance. That's not to mention all the things I was going to "catch up on". I felt as if I were the one in school here for a brief moment. Actually I am. Each September the knot in my stomach is reawakened by the knowledge that the dreaded procrastination gene is embedded in my children's' DNA.

Well Julian, he is just busy hosting tea parties in his new class - no homework yet. Kindergarten. But it's coming, oh yes it's coming. The good news is that he's settling in nicely to his new school and role as lower gradesman. He is already making a name for himself. That's my little mayor. Tali starts school tomorrow. She, on the other hand, had a homework packet over the summer of which she seemed to neglect a few unfinished details, say like - writing a story! With a bit of divine intervention FOUND HERE and some writer's cramp on Tali's part, the packet is complete.

And since the bus service is not in place yet for Little Miss Can't Be Wrong (you remember the Spin Doctors), I will be schlepping into Manhattan with her at 7:00 am. Scissors will get Julian to school.

And so goes week #2 of my vacation. So if I have not responded to emails or commented at your blogs, you are all never far from my heart.

Now then, if you'd like to sign up for Homework Helpers, please do so in the comments section. If you have a particular subject you'd like to volunteer for, please indicate that there.

I'd also like to recognize Icy of TOM AND ICY fame as inspiration in Tali's last story due for school - tomorrow. Tali enjoys following Icy's adventures out in the yard, (as do I) and so named the dog in her story Icy.

The good news may just be that I'll be back in work next week.

A Tropical Depression?

We're home.

Survived Ernesto. Well no big deal he was only a tropical depression - downgraded from a tropical storm. And a blackout.

Yesterday was our last full day of vacation. Call us weird. Okay, got that out of the way early, but I don't really care if it's sunny and 80. I mean it's nice and all but I just like to be on vacation at the beach. We were in Montauk. It is another place and time. Even sitting in the hotel room, you stare across the road at the ocean. And it was angry this week. Looking at it, I felt calm. I always do. So back to yesterday, Scissors said that he was going to take Julian for a walk into town (our secret weapon to tire him out which only tires us out it seems). As I write about this, the following song pops into my head:

Cakewalk Into Town by Taj Mahal

I had the blues so bad one time
It put my face in a permanent frown
You know I'm feeling so much better
I could cakewalk into town.

I love the blues - for perfect little choruses like that.

So while the boys cakewalked, the girls painted rocks. This was after we had been out for the day and it was sort of misty throughout. It was nice though. It was a stop and drive day. Ooh art show - today only. Stop - view - chat - drive. Ooh Scenic Overlook. Stop - look at map - run down hiking trail with Julian stop make our way back drive. Make it out to Lighthouse stop climb up steps ooh pictures climb down steps go down to beach stop. Admire the fury of the waters which are in such an exaggerated form today. The wind actually knocked Tali over. Hey she just wanted to feel the seafoam. Back to car regroup have quick snack drive. Scissors has in his head fish and chips drive go down by piers stop find a good place stop go in for fish and chips Drive. And that was our day. That's perfection for me - no schedule.

After some rock painting, Tali and I decide to watch a movie. I'm dozing off when pft - the television goes off. I wake up and the lights have gone out as well! We try them and look outside - lights out! Daddy and Julian!!! And it's raining! Hurry get shoes on and run out to car to go look for them. As Tali and I drive down Old Montauk Highway, here they come cakewalking back from town! Laughing along, not a care in the world! Pull over and haul the stragglers in.

We drive back towards town and lights back on! Scissors wanted to get Julian a souvenir sweatshirt and so we go to one of the shops. Long story short, lights go back out, we get the sweatshirt and when we get back to our room Scissors has "accidentally" shoplifted a pair of sunglasses that Julian had on. They were sort of Elton Johnish - kind of rosy with gemstones. He took them away from Julian and stuck them in his pocket to put back onto the rack (seems suspect I know unless you know Scissors - then it makes perfect sense) when the lights went out and it was black, except for the glow-in-the-dark dinosaur on the tee shirt on the wall. The store staff rescued us with a flashlight and led us to safety.

All in time for us to go home and finish painting rocks by tealight. You tell me the last time you did that on vacation!

Missed you all, feeling a bit rusty but it's good to be home.

TTFN!

Be back for Labor Day! Miss you all allready. Remember. take in mail, water plants...ah who cares!?

I'm on vacation!

Hasta la vista!

SHOWTIME!

GET YOUR TICKETS HERE: MOVIEPHONE

Sar, is there any significance in this being post #47? Another nifty link courtesy of PAVEL

You didn't think I'd leave without leaving one last little shred of shameless self-promotion behind, did you? I'll be gone (unless I get to check in) for the rest of the week. Now I leave this esteemed caption contest and switch into Zen mode to welcome the ocean's calming waves.

See you all when I get back.

Watch over my little place here. Don't want squatters to take over. I heard that - yeah, they may do a better job, but are they offering free popcorn?

I didn't think so.

xox

VACATION

Beach chairs check. Beach umbrella check. Camera. Check.

See Scissors I've got a list. Right here, (yeah I got yer list). Every year, it's the same thing. I'm going to be prepared. Holy sunblock Batman! Where did the past two weeks go? See I'm not in panic mode because I do believe we pretty much have everything we need - now we just need it in the "good to go" mode. As in packed. He's so efficient about packing but that's basically because he pretty much travels with a hobo's hanky tied on a stick and he's ready for vacation. Yet he always has the right things to wear when he needs them. Seasoned traveler. Me? Overpacker. I have gotten much better, but still.

I am jealous of that ability to go somewhere without worrying about covering all bases. I schlep snacks/water/toys/first aid when we go to the local playground. What's that kids? Special pillows, fuzzy pink blanky - yeah sure shove them in the backseat.

We roll out tomorrow morning. If you want to join us, now's the time to come over because we'll be leaving early. I swear. As soon as I find the thingey to the watchamacallit - camera related items. Ah Scissors will get that.

Water. Check. Kids - of course, they're on my list somewhere! See - right after the toothpaste!

Sun? Can't find it, but I know it's here somewhere.

Did you just see a snowflake?

IF IT'S AUGUST, IT MUST BE SNOWING SOMEWHERE!


Now don't be impatient to catch any old flake, wait for the one marked "yours"!



The writer gratefully acknowledges PAVEL'S WEATHER FORECAST for this snowflake.

Do you come seeking your fortune?

Your Fortune Is

A bird in the hand is safer than one overhead.

The Wacky Fortune Cookie Generator

I got this from SAR'S PLACE, so I hope she won't mind that I've decided to offer my visitors a fortune cookie after their dinner (please feel free to stay, we make plenty).

I know this pales in comparison to the wise and wonderful words of the DALAI BOBO, and may not be very Zen like, but if nothing else they are practical.

And who can't use a dose of fortune and practicality all rolled into one I ask?

It Was 90 Days Ago Today

G enters blog which for the purpose of today's post looks like an empty dance studio. Cues music - Bill Medley and Jennifer Warnes and fade in..."Well I've had the time of my life. No I've never felt this way before, Yeah I swear it's the truth and I owe it all to y-" scraaatch - arm getting dragged across record. STOP! People have no idea what the heck is going on here! Today is three months since my first post hit the streets. For those of you not here for the WELCOMEtake a look, scroll down to the beginning. How could there have been a time when you all weren't here?




I must say, it is hard to believe the friends that I've made over the past three months. Wow, only three months - and all this could be yours, with monthly installments of $9.99 and if you act now, we'll give you a second blog free!

"Hell with winnebagos, we're giving them away". Okay, that's my contest, first to name what song that's from, gets...to vote for me at SAR'S today and tomorrow. Or tomorrow, or, not "and tomorrow".

I have documented why I started blogging - just to write and find my voice. I have indicated frustration along the way. Come on, what worth having or finding in life is easy? Please tell me nothing, otherwise, I'll wonder why things don't always feel so easy for me. I'm not whining, just musing. There is a vast difference. Just don't ask me to explain it.

Music cues back up..."You're the one thing I can't get enough of, I tell you something. This must be love because I've had..." G sashays across studio!

Nobody puts baby in a corner!

We got a 402 in progress...

It was an evening like any other in the Lampshade Household. The kids each had reasons why they ate their dinner a little earlier and so for Julian after a full day in his underpants and no accidents, he decided that enough was enough. After cleaning him up, into the bathtub he went. Tali decided she wanted to take a shower and so went downstairs for same.

Which left Scissors and I to have dinner as the two of them luxuriated on their respective lilly pads. The two of us - no kids at the table.

That is until I heard, "MOMMMMMMMMMYYYYYYYY!!!!!!" which caused me to drop my fork and go sprinting downstairs to a locked bathroom door. Jiggle handle - "Tali, what's the matter?!" Horrified sobbing response:

T: "There's a spider outside the shower door".
M: "Okay, open the door and let me in."
T: "If I do that, he'll jump on me."
M: "Tali, spiders don't jump. Open the door quickly and just hit the handle of the door."
T: "It jumps, I saw it jump!"
M: "Open the door, Tali, I can't help you from out here."
T: "This is why I want you to take a shower with me."
M: "Open the door Tali, you can do it."

Parental Unit 1 calls for backup to Parental Unit 2 who joins me. "We got a kid frozen in fear in the shower, spider spotted on premises, *crackle* request backup."

D: "Tali open the door, it's Daddy, I'll get whatever it is.
T: "I caaaan't - I'm afraid".

I get kicked upstairs - 10 minutes elapse. Daughter still holed up in shower. I go back downstairs. Tali pleads, "Go outside and throw something in the window at it to get rid of it." I'm desperate enough for it to make sense. I go outside, open the screen (yes dear readers, this is the city so there are of course some bars (nice looking ornamental) but yes bars on the window which would prevent anyone from climbing in a tiny window that maybe a Bratz doll would fit through anyway. I can however, reach through and open the screen and for once be happy that there is a nurf football on the windowsill (?) okay. I pelt it in the direction of the offender.

M: "Tali, is it there?"
T: "It's not moving, it's dead.
M: "Okay I'm coming in - open the door."
T: "It's not deeeaaaadd, throw some other things"

Alright, three clothespins and a large wooden dreidl later (which again I am only too happy to have on hand to pelt but do wonder why we would need a dreidl in August in the backyard), the offender has moved, but not enough to satisfy Tali. A few Ello design pieces of Tali's shoved under the door and the offender has moved away from the shower door. Whereby I talk Tali off the ledge and the lever clicks downward allowing me to gallantly burst in with toilet paper in hand, drop on the floor, move things around and find a...grasshopper! Well now that would account for the jumping!

Animal rights activists may want to leave the room now. I smashed him up in the toilet paper and flushed him to his watery resting place. I turned to Tali who had injured herself in the shear terror of the moment and had blood on her side from digging her nails in. As I wrapped her up and said "There there, it's okay, Mommy's here, it's gone." Tali, no longer crying but needing to have someone to blame for this horror, glared "I told you that you should take a shower with me".

And so up we went to get her ready for the cooldown with the weaponry from the attack still lying on the floor.

Why couldn't she just have inherited my eye color?

Sir Edmund Hillary of Queens

I was about to post some Urban Blight when my server went all "I'm scared of that" on me. So instead I bring you my very own Sir Edmund Hillary ascending the Hillary Step.

Actually, this is a small rock climbing wall in one of the local parks - Juniper Valley Park. This is excellent for Julian as he has difficulty with hand eye coordination and this sort of forces that concentration necessary to ascend the "summit". He is so proud of himself when he makes it to the top and often does so without anyone helping him. There was another great picture of Tali and Julian together, but as it turned out I videod instead of photoed and apparently I haven't advanced that far in my mucking about.

Goes back into her bag of tricks (sound of pots/pans digital cameras being flung about), how about a 75% of the fam pic? Tired, but willing to soldier on for ice cream:

Where am I? Why documenting this urban existence.

Technical difficulties with the date, but we're getting there. I must send out thanks to all for the encouragement, but it was my dear little nonchalant GOOD GIRL, yes GG who tossed off the idea to just start shoving things into slots in the computer. Something like that. Sound technical advice as it turns out. Somewhere in Tennessee, SUPER NERD is tossing in his sleep.

So thank you GG. For helping me to post and keeping me one day further from actually reading a manual.

Technology, you're killing me!

Ahh those were simpler times. May 2006. My first blog post. So young so innocent. Fast forward to the present day. That's right - my three month anniversary coming up right about now. I'll have to set flowers next to the computer.

I took a few fun/interesting pictures that would make a great backdrop for a post right about now. Where are they? Don't break your mouse trying to select on some unseen link that I've messed up. They're stored safely in my digital camera. That's right - the one that we were last on the block to get. I won it at the "Company Picnic" about a year ago. Nothing fancy, but now that I'd like to pull all the pieces together, I can't find the software install disk for my PC and the USB thingey. *^%$*



They were lovely pictures of urban blight, rock climbing and just another day in the Lampshade Family.

How I spent my summer vacation.

Want to hear a fairy tale?

Then go here: TALES FROM JERUSALEM NEW YORK.

It is an enchanting tale of a princess and a dragon. Hope that you enjoy it. I know I did!

Doing it Every Day - Addendum

I started this as a return comment to yesterday's post and it got a little lengthy, so in my head it made sense to go for the extra credit points of a post. Simmer down - the points are self awarded!

You'll please pardon my broader rather than individual response to yesterday's post. I did want to thank you for coming by for visits, reading and even liking my writing. I must say it is encouraging. Really, I thank all who took the time to comment, I so appreciate the various viewpoints and feelings that my posts provoke.

I think Minka got at the crux of where I was going though, this is a creative discipline that may just be necessary. Self imposed,not borne of external expectations. And I'd have to thank Pia for her advice as well because she's been down this path for some time; her advice makes sense and she knows, it seems, exactly the struggle I am alluding to. That of balance and writing for writing's sake. I'll point out that both Minka and Pia (like myself) are Cancerians. Hmmmm.

My every day requim is basically to force myself into creative mode. It is a discipline that I have heard recommended by the real professionals. But I don't need to publish every day, I can write on my own as well - as Pia pointed out. Do you get better at roller skating by doing it once a week? You're probably able to get up and get around on them, but you might also like to be able to skate backwards. As I write, I can pay attention to the important grammatical and technical side of sentence construction, the latter I may be just a tad sloppy at and the former, well my basics are good. Work is needed.

I enjoy the social aspect of blogging as well but as I: 1) work pretty much full time 2) have two children who would like some attention 3) have a husband - hey what about me says Scissors. I did this to start writing not necessarily reading. I realize that last comment sounds insulting, but pleae it is not intended as such. That's the problem - you're all so enjoyable, I need to be able to manage it better. That's where it gets tricky.

Hey, it's a procees. I'm learning. But I'm enjoying every step of the way.

Speaking of Steps Neva, when does our Tuesday meeting start?

Should I do it every day?

Write that is! Nasty little so-and-sos!

Although still within the probationary period, I am fast becoming a blog veteran. Ask Doug, we grow so quickly. And call me observant, but it seems a number of blogs that I jump around to, write every day! This anvil fell on my head today as I looked at a couple of non-regulars. There was a theme emerging - one post followed the next, in chronological order. Now I have not really been disciplined in doing so. I write a post here, put a picture there and voila - I have myself a post on average, oh every three days! Just when I think I'm doing well - I come across the overachiever crowd - the professionals.

It makes sense though. Get in the habit of writing. Develop your voice. Two of the reasons I started blogging. Really work at it. Oops, shouldn't have typed that... Work!? This was supposed to be fun. Well it is. You're tricking me. You can have fun and learn! I'm getting nervous. I'll have to think, have fun, this introduces a whole new dimension. Well how about if you just write and don't think of it at all? You remember that book, The Artist's Way? Yeah more trickery. I think I sold it in that garage sale. Maybe I shouldn't have. How long did you do those "Morning Pages"? Every day. How long? For a time. How long? I think maybe 3 weeks - a month! Eight days. Okay, how about my journals? Yeah, sure how about them? I was just reading some entries to Tali last night! Uh huh - some entries. Bout how many? Well I read her about three - there were more. Oh how we laughed at those three! Really? How many more? About, tap tap tap, uh three. That would be impressive - if it were over the period of - a week. I know, I was busy - she was a baby and then Julian came along. Okay, they're four years apart. Alright so the six lousy entries spanned five years. They were busy meaningful years. I have pictures. I'll put words to them at some point. Where are those pictures?

Okay, this is getting personal. Interview over. I feel attacked. I feel that I should write about it. Perhaps every day. Okay, posts every other day? Let's talk about this over coffee? How do you like yours? Every day.

You know I was just thinking of cutting back. On my caffeine consumption!

Gaze upon the waters...

Gaze upon the waters my beautiful child
For the answers are all there to see
The peace that awaits you quietly there
and knows you are who you should be.



Please forgive me as I am not a poet, but love this picture, wanted to share it and the writing serves only as a caption. This picture was taken on the beach at Montauk where we will be heading in about two weeks. Somehow life's a little freer and easier there (as vacations should be).

Now who wants to help me look for Montauk rocks? Maybe we'll even find some shells.

You got off easy!

You know I'm sitting here and I could cry. You must think I cry a lot. Not really, except when I write things that touch something inside.

Tonight when I got home from work, we ate quickly and headed out to a local park. The night was clear, humidity low; the kids ran around enjoying the freedom. We're here to hang out and enjoy a free concert so blankets and chairs are spread everywhere. The musicians are just warming up.

Now I have mentioned a bit about Julian. You see, sometimes he walks around without awareness, i.e., across blankets, kicking a ball in his path, sitting in someone's seat - it's all fair game. Sort of the Mr. Magoo of the Preschool set. He has certain sensory integration issues where his body doesn't always signal "too close", "take a step back", "don't lay across that child".

Tonight, children are criss-crossing in their various activities. If you are not tracking Julian's every move, it may go okay, it may not. Sometimes in the mayhem of settling in, we each think the other is watching. I mean we're there with friends, he's within peripheral vision. The other thing is sometimes in the mayhem, Julian's not sure what to do when he finds himself in the center of 50 kids running this way and that. I'm scanning and I see him. A child has just fallen down. Oh very nice, he's going over to help him u - oh not very nice, he's going to lay on top of the kid. As he is in motion to do so and has pretty much accomplished this feat, I yell out "Julian!" and at this time the kid's father takes Julian by his upper arm which isn't too much bigger than my wrist and waves the equivalent of a red flag in front of a bull - he exerts a slight pressure. Now I get there of course in .0125 seconds and say "Don't put your hands on my son - didn't you see me coming?!". To which he shoots back "Well that's only the third time". To which I say, "I am here, you see me coming, don't you ever ever put your hands on my child - EVER.". Now at this point I have the Queens Crazy Bitch look and I'm thinking I'll rip his head off and kick it across the field. It seems he senses this and turns and beats a hasty retreat to his yenta wife on their blanket. Luckily Scissors is not there in this moment. We may have been like sharks in a feeding frenzy. Don't get me wrong, I correct Julian, redirect him, don't let him get away with actions with impunity. But here's the thing, he has no idea, there is no malicious intent in his actions. It's a work in process learning all of these social ques. I certainly would never and have never put my hand to someone's child period.

Julian has taken this opportunity and has now struck off on the great squirrel hunt. When I catch him, he does not want to hear about his misdeeds, and is quickly on the path to the old story change "so then it's just pathetic! pathetic!" both hands gesticulating about as he tries to escape around the tree. He doesn't necessarily mean this about the present situation, but these are the words he can call up. As I think back it is just pathetic, no less than 3 people gave him "a look" when he stepped on their blanket or went to sit on a stool with one of their kids. It's downright cruel. I would never be mean to a child, just never.

Believe me, I understand Kathleen Turner's role in the movie Serial Mom.

Next time I won't be so nice.

Tickled Pinky - I Came in 2nd!

That is in the "Name the Cuff" contest at another New Friend in the Neighborhood's blog. By way of background, her name is PINKY. and she designs and crafts jewelry which is sold here in PINKY'S SHOP. So far so good says I. This honor is partly thanks to our dear techie friend,PAVEL (being perfectly clear), who not only does all the research for us on the latest gadgets we probably won't own, but steered us in the direction of said contest. Things were looking up.

Armed with freshly squeezed aggravation (from squabbling over the proper temp to suffocate a family of four), I headed over to see the cuff in question. I am a sucker for custom jewelry and did I like what I saw! I called it "Wavelength". Although it did not get the winning nod, it came in a close second (sort of like the Joe Lieberman of bangle naming). That second place entitles me to a nice little discount which left unused, would be tantamount to wadding up some bills and throwing them out the window of a speeding car I rationalize, uh reason. I have made several "dry runs" to decide what is worthy of my hard won discount and have it narrowed down to four or five lovely pieces. Do I have to choose?

In all seriousness, Pinky's shop called - Pinky's Shop, showcases her beautifully designed and handmade jewelry. Each special and unique. Now for specifics of that jewelry, I suggest you head on over and ahem, think of any birthdays coming up (first look at your calendar)or think of someone that you may wish to honor <hint hint> and take a browse.

I like both her unique designs and the idea of supporting a fellow blogger. Who knows, she may just have another jewelry piece to name...

Wish list provided upon request.

I'm 30!!!

Well actually that train came and left the station some time ago. No this is post #30. Nothing remarkable planned. In fact, just trying to write a little more about what I know not as I have not come inspired. Shall I post pictures of my habitat? Eventually, need to get my digital camera "things" that enable hook-up to the computer all set up. Tap tap tap.

Okay above was started a few days ago and so apparently inspiration or time have not been plentiful. And here I am smack in the middle of Sunday night. It seems that a force outside of me started this blog. No, not Pia or Doug although the way Pia was so matter of fact about it, sort of like "if you want to start one, let me know" just made it seem so - possible and I think Doug eventually threatened to just start one for me. With Pia's encouragement and Doug's threats, here it is - Simply Said.

Forewarned is fair armed so if you think this is going to be one of those fun posts, head on over to the sidebar and run without looking back to CENTRAL SNARK. or any other number of fun, or well-written hangouts where I bide my time. But for some reason I sit here alone in a quiet house while my kids slumber. And I'm not feeling peaceful as I should be in this moment. And I'm not feeling able to put down on paper why. And I'm wondering why people make marriage look so easy. And I'm wondering why when it's me and my children, we're so happy together. And I'm wondering why you should have to argue when it's 80 degrees outside at the use of central air conditioning. And I'm wondering why I have a headache. And I'm wondering why I'd like to actually pull a certain Mr. Scissors hair out of his head. And I'm wondering. Then I'm understanding why divorce is rampant. Then I understand why kids never quite get over it but never quite miss the bickering. Then I understand that petty arguments do more to unravel a kid's happiness. Then I understand. I know we will not be divorced, although I sometimes dream about that. I know that my children will feel happy in their home. I understand it will not always be easy. I wish my kids did not see me being so real sometimes. But I understand my doing so paves the way for their scary emotions to be allowed and talked about. Maybe that's why I blog, mine never were.

My mother said on one of our "Calls from the Road" referring to how it wasn't always easy growing up in a large family, maybe my sibling to whom she referred didn't feel heard - she says to me. I want to say yes, Ma, that's right - we didn't have enough attention. Wah. If it only were so simple. And why shatter her illussions that she puts her head upon each night. She's 81! She should live and be well.

And without having said anything, I've said something. Without baring my soul, I've uncovered a nerve. I know. I understand why John Lennon wrote that Woman is the Nigger of the World. And I wish that I didn't. And I still have a headache.

"LET THE GAMES BEGINS!"

This is what Julian yells from atop his bed where he has dragged any pillow within dragging distance. To which I hear Tali go into little teacher mode and gently correct "Julian, it's let the games begin" as she brushes her hair getting ready for camp. Right. Julian continues "Let the games begins!" in his best by order of the decree of the king voice. And so starts another day in the Lampshade household. I love overhearing them in the morning as we all are in different stages of our daily routines.

Last night when I got home from work, Tali was working with her Hebrew tutor. Rachel is illustrating usage of a word and says "For instance, the king went to the store", to illustrate a Hebrew usage. To which Tali responded "That sounds funny". Rachel asks "Because a king doesn't shop for himself?". "Well" Tali said "maybe you should say that the king went to the Chinese Restaurant to get his fortune". Rachel asks "Fortune cookie?" Tali "no - fortune, get it?". I'm enjoying this but then begin to wonder what this all has to do with Hebrew verbs.

Going to bed tonight and I'm getting the kids ready for the wind down, which includes my escape to evening activities sans them. "These mosquitoes are killers this year" says I as I dab on more Calamine lotion. "What is an insect?" asks Julian. "It's a bug" says Tali. "No, I want Mommy to tell me". Mommy, (as played by me) dutifully replies "It's a bug". "A bee?" asks Julian. "Well a bee is a bug, but not all bugs are bees." says Mommy. "Enough of the bait and switch into bed you bug!" Looking to catch anothr train, he tries "Transylvanian Alligator" (a little character I made up). "Not tonight Julian, the Transylvanian alligator is in the bogs." "What's a bog?" asks Tali. And so ends another day in the Lampshade Household.

Do you know that a lady bug is indeed a beetle? Of course you did.